Question to self: is it really possible to find “The One” by swiping left and right out of boredom, sitting in your office cubicle?
Long gone are the days when butterflies in your stomach lasted weeks or months. In those days, the first date was meticulously planned several weeks in advance, and the excitement from it lasted several weeks to follow. Now, you swipe right, you talk, you meet and take it to the next base, all in the span of one week (or less). Welcome to 2015 – the fast-paced age of smartphones. A time when two people sitting next to each other are separated by an entire world of newsfeeds, notifications and selfies, from people that hardly matter.
I know this topic is very well-discussed across the Internet, but somehow I felt the need to gather my own thoughts about how much I’d love for things to go back to the golden days. Back to when men were real gentlemen, leading the way, opening doors and most importantly, making time for you. Back to when hook-ups weren’t the norm, and people dated to find their soulmate.
With the introduction of speed dating apps like Tinder, it has become so ridiculously easy to stumble upon your “match” that focused, purposeful dating may actually be a thing of the past. Not to forget, these “matches” are formed solely on your mili-second long opinion of someone’s picture: clearly, that is the sole criterion for you to find your match. He may be a complete jerk, but wait, isn’t that what the “un-match” button is for?
The biggest fear that comes from such mindless, superficial and hurried means of falling into such a commitment is that it might be just as easy to fall out of it. Just like Flappy Bird or Facebook, dating has been reduced to another distraction awaiting us on the App store.
Here are my top tips to tackle modern dating issues, especially if you’re in your late 20’s/early 30’s and looking to finally settle down.
- Know what you’re looking for in a partner
Regardless of how the first meeting takes place, you need to know what you want in your partner and from your relationship. This won’t just save you time, but it will help you find the right person without going through multiple idiots. Also, don’t go back and forth on your expectations.
- Work hard for it
While you have everything at your fingertips, I truly believe working hard for something makes it worthwhile. Don’t limit yourself to lame apps like WhatsApp and Snapchat; go out of your way for him/her. In our technology-driven world, even frequent phone calls count as a blessing. Prove that you’re not doing this for fun, but are in fact looking for a lifelong partner.
- Don’t give up
Can’t stress the importance of this one. While it seems so easy to just close the chapter on a few flaws and move on to your next catch, don’t. Yes, there are plenty of fish in the ocean, but thinking that way isn’t going to get you to your true love. True love does not come without trouble: it tests you over and over again, and it is up to you to deal with the mess and come out stronger.
- Keep things exciting
With so many distractions, it’s easy to get bored of anything these days, even love. Don’t let that ruin things for you, because if it happens once, it can happen again. Fight it.
- Be loyal
… this one shouldn’t need an explanation.
Meanwhile, song of the day: